Finish this sentence: “My job as a claimsprofessional would be much easier if the customer would just____.”

Invariably, workshop attendees most often fill in that blankwith “listen.” One of the claims maxims we have stressed over theyears is, “People will listen to you to the exact degree you showthem you understand their point of view.” The interaction below,which we overheard while monitoring phone calls, provides a lessonin listening. How would you have handled the situation?

The insurance company representative dials the phone numberlisted for the claimant. The phone rings, and Mr. Swope picksup.

Mr. Swope:“Hello.”

Meg: “Hello—this isMeg from Typical Insurance Company, and I'm calling about your autoaccident. I know you had damage to your car. I am sorry that wedon't have any independent adjusters available right now. Can youget an estimate on the repairs and send that to me?”

Mr. Swope: “No way;I'm not going to do that.”

Meg: “Why isthat?”

Mr.Swope: “I'll tell you why:Because I'm the victim here. Why should I run around doingyour job?”

Meg: “Well, it's notmy job to prove your claim; it's your job. You have to do this inorder to get paid.”

What went wrong during the call? How would you or your claimsstaff have dealt with Mr. Swope? It's clear that you don't want toargue. Yet, it is also necessary to demonstrate that you fullyunderstand his point of view so that he will be open to listening.However, what is Mr. Swope really telling Meg?

Emotionally Charged Verbiage

When Mr. Swope responded, “Because I'm the victim here,” Megglossed over a crucial and highly emotional word—victim—and beganarguing about where the onus lay to resolve the claim. So here isour suggestion: Pay special attention when customers use emotionalwords. Such words are vivid and, provided that you are listening,are easy to pick out during the conversation.

When customers use emotional words with their reasons, it is ahint the issue is important to them. In this case, Mr. Swope usedthe word “victim.” What connotations does “victim” normally conjureup? Generally, we associate the word with a crime having beencommitted. Had he been the victim of a wrongful act, then Mr. Swopewould be using the word correctly. But you know what? He is not toofar off. After all, Mr. Swope wasn't doing anything wrong whensomeone slammed his or her car into his. Because of the fault ofanother, he must now miss a day of work. This day “off” will be farfrom relaxing; in fact, he'll spend it running around obtainingestimates for the repairs. No wonder Mr. Swope feels like a victim.It's a perfectly reasonable perception.

The Empathic Connection

Think of the empathic connection as the difference between whatsomeone said and what they actually meant.Consider what Mr. Swope said, “I'm the victim here.” What Mr. Swopewanted is empathy for having been involved in an auto accident.What Meg should have done is focus on the emotional wordand what it meant. This represents the ability to make an empathicconnection. It's certainly not always easy.

Here's another scenario we encountered while monitoring phonecalls. During a FNOL interaction, the claims professional wastalking to a customer who said, “Oh man, my brand new Porsche iscreamed.” The adjuster responded with, “Don't worry; we'llcompensate you for the repairs.” It's a subtle oversight on thepart of the representative. The customer is seeking an empatheticresponse, only that reflects the disappointment associated withhaving a brand new—and rather expensive—car severely damaged. Theclaims professional in this case missed what was meant versus whatwas said. 

Learning Opportunities

Now try this one:  Let's say a wife walks up to herhusband and says, “Wow, Shirley sure is lucky her husband bringsher flowers.” The husband responds, “She sure is.”Obviously, what the wife said and what she meantare two different things. What did she mean when she said, “Shirleysure is lucky her husband brings her flowers”? Well, the wifemeant, “I would like flowers, please.” But that's not what shesaid. The unsuspecting husband failed to make the empathicconnection between what his wife said and what she reallymeant.

Let's get back to the customer with the Porsche. We'veestablished that the claims professional didn't make the empathicconnection, either. When the customer said, “My brand new Porscheis creamed,” the customer wasn't asking, “Will I be compensated forthe damages to my automobile?” Rather, the customer was saying, “Mylife is upside down right now. I am so upset, I'm besidemyself.”

Now if the claims professional had considered what was meantversus what was said and made the empathic connection, he or shecould have said something like, “You know what? If your brand newPorsche is creamed, then I am sorry. I know this is going to bedifficult for you. I know you probably loved that car. If there wasa way I could take that accident back, then I'd love to do it. ButI can't. What I can do, however, is to make sure you geteverything to which you're entitled.”

As a claims professional, listen for emotional words andconsider what the customer means. A genuine, empathic connectionwith the customer is a skill that great claims people use to gaincooperation.

Great claims people take their empathic connection a stepfurther; they tie in the customer changing the way they feel, towhat they want the customer to do. If you can tie in the customerchanging the way they feel, with what you want them to do, the morelikely the customer will do it. Here's an example of what wemean:

Mr. Swope:“Hello.”

Meg: “Hello, this isMeg from Typical Insurance Company, and I'm calling about your autoaccident. I know you had damage to your car. I am sorry that wedon't have any independent adjusters available right now. Can youget the estimate on the repairs and send that to me?”

Mr. Swope: “No way,I'm not going to do that.”

Meg: “Why is that,sir?”

Mr. Swope: “I'lltell you why: Because I'm the victim here. Why should I run arounddoing your job?”

Meg: “You know, Mr.Swope, if you don't want to get an estimate because you're feelinglike a victim, then I can understand that. You weren't doinganything wrong when our insured's vehicle slammed into yours. Iappreciate how this makes you feel. I'll tell you what, if youcan go get an estimate, some good things will happen.First of all, you will get to pick the shop, so you can work withsomeone you trust. Second, you'll be there when the estimate iswritten to ensure they don't miss anything. That's good for you.Third, if you can get them to fax it to me, then I'll get a checkout to you as soon as possible. When you're back on the road andcan get all of this behind you, maybe you won't have to feel like avictim anymore. Because that's a lousy way to feel, and I'd like tohelp.”

Did you see how Meg acknowledged Mr. Swope's reason, made theempathic connection of what was meant with the emotional word, andtied in getting what she wanted from him? Maybe Mr. Swope will dowhat Meg asks. Maybe he won't. Either way, Meg's job is hard enoughwithout arguing with Mr. Swope about whether he is a victim orwhose job it is to prove the claim.

Points About Listening

• People will listen to you to the exact degree you show them youunderstand their point of view.
• Demonstrate you understand their point of view by acknowledgingit.
• The best way to acknowledge someone's point of view is torepeat it back to them.
• Don't argue with reasons. Acknowledge reasons and get back todiscussing the facts.
• Pay attention when customers use emotional words.