Santa Claus Inc., the international toy maker, is a risky business that has serious insurance coverage problems, according to a consulting firm report.
"Santa's North Pole operation is a self-insured nightmare," said the study's author, Kevin R. Gallagher a vice president at Holmdel, N.J.-based Chiltington International Inc., which advises on insurance and reinsurance.
Mr. Gallagher said he thought Mr. Claus "would have a difficult time obtaining insurance or reinsurance based on his operation."
According to the Chiltington report, Mr. Claus is chief executive officer of one of the world's largest toy manufacturing facilities.
"This facility is located at the North Pole–one of the coldest and most dangerous places in the world. Santa's risk manager must be pulling his hair out," advised Mr. Gallagher
He said he had recently interviewed "Elmo, chief elf and risk manager. Here are just a few of the problems he's dealing with. The elves are complaining about the long work hours, lack of appropriate medical benefits, no 401(k)'s or pension plans. Not to mention the fact that they don't like the green and red costumes they are forced to wear. And if they go on strike, there won't be enough time to complete the toys for good girls and boys."
Mr. Gallagher said there are also problems with animal rights activists complaining about conditions the reindeer are faced with. They must fly long hours, in extreme cold and they could fall and injure themselves while stopped on steep, snow covered roofs, he noted.
The consultant also pointed out that Mr. Claus has to worry about severe exposure to the elements, slipping and falling, as well as inhaling soot from the millions of chimneys he goes in and out of on Christmas Eve.
"It doesn't help that he consumes all the milk and cookies the children put out for him. Because he is getting on in years, as the pounds pile on, his risks of heart attack increase. If he is ill, who will deliver the toys?" Mr. Gallagher wondered.
He said Elmo is especially worried about product defect issues with the toys. With the added political risks around the world, Elmo also is wondering if he can find a carrier for kidnap and ransom coverage–business interruption was difficult enough to find.
"Elmo has a tough job, but he's determined to help Santa continue to deliver toys to good girls and boys," Mr. Gallagher reported. "Merry Christmas and happy holidays!" he added.
For more on his findings contact kgallagher@nj.chiltingtonusa.com
National Underwriter cannot attest to the accuracy of this report but is happy to pass it on with best wishes for the holidays.
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